The following journal was picked up by Torment on Flamerule (the month after Kythorn) 6
Should the processes of the following weeks fail to grant me immunity from the coming cataclysm and instead reduce me to lifelessness, let the pages of this journal serve as the last will and testament of Koshin D’rain, Highest Scholar of Candlekeep, Lord of the Sealed Tower, Knowledge-Bearer of the Planes, and future heir to the promises of Vecna. May his unhallowed name forever escape the lies of his death.
To my former colleagues: Maesters Aramis Goldpetal, Tarin Heathrune, Blaise Westwind, and Pelo Thagreen. Each of your names will be remembered until the end of the world for your contributions to your individual fields in which each of you is unmatched. We’ve known each other since we were acolytes in Baldur’s Gate, and while I would like to consider you all my equals, the truth is, I surpassed all of you long ago. Still, if there is anyone I trust to take care of the Sealed Tower and all that’s in it should I perish, it would be the four of you.
But while your names may live on in the tomes of scholars until the world’s end, it is my goal to have more than just my name live on. I fear none of you will live through the coming war, so even if I fail in my machinations, my tower still may end in ruins. But it is because of the coming war that I must do what each of you would rather kill me to prevent. You will view it as heresy, as blasphemy, as a violation against all the laws of magic which you have dedicated your lives to upholding. But I am not willing to die before unlocking all of the secrets within those laws. I am not willing to accept the fate that awaits me – that awaits you all – when the war comes.
And so I am undertaking the construction of a phylactery to preserve my soul should this body be destroyed. Lord Vecna – who is not dead and never will be – has revealed to me a way to escape fate, to live forever as a lich. But I will not be like those liches which you have sworn to oppose to your dying breaths. I will not be consumed by evil, but I will use this evil power to do great things. Good things. Beautiful things in the name of knowledge and the arcane. And most importantly, I will survive.
(Koshin’s handwriting in this entry has become messy – much messier than the nearly flawless script of his previous entry)
The process….. The phylactery has failed me. NO….NO…..NO……NOTH…Nothing. Nothing. I am nothing.
But I must continue. I must find a way to endure. To survive. NO NO NO NOTH NOTHING.
Losing memories already. Faint images. My name is Koshin D’rain. My name is Koshin D’rain. D…D….Deranged. MY NAME IS KOSHIN D’RAIN!
You damned scholars and your books! This is all your fault! Goldpetal, Heathrune, Westwind, Thagreen…I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you! NO! I will destroy you all if I live through this! NO NO NO! The books….the books….There must be an alternative. Another way. Another.
There must be an alternative. Ock and Spaught tell me I look worse with every spell… NO NO NO NOTH NOTHING! There’s another way. Another form. I just need flesh…flesh….flesh. The books…yes. The books tell me I need flesh.
Why have you done this to me, Vecna? NO NO NO. I must stay myself. I must stay Koshin. Koshin D’rain. Koshin D’rain. D’rain. Derain. Derainged. Deranged. I must stay Koshin Deranged. I must stay Deranged.
NO NO NO NO NOTH NOTH NOTHING!
Just a few….a few more…. No magic. NO NO NOTH NOTH NOTH NOTHING. No magic. I must do this with as little with as little with as few spells as possible. Just a few more… They will not mind. They would have died anyway…. Flesh…. Their flesh for my survival. There, there….Hush….It will all be over soon.
What….what am I becoming? Their screams….